Sebring Halloween

October 31, 2017

We are getting settled into the gentle life Sebring, FL provides. Even so, there are still boxes everywhere in our new house. We even had to clear the entryway to open the door for the anticipated trick or treaters. Mike told me that he heard our neighborhood is a very popular spot for the kids.

It is the first time we have ever had many trick or treaters. I have already lost count and determined we did not buy enough candy.

Spiderman, Princesses galore, ghosts, gunshot victims, cowboys, nerds, plus scary big ones, teens-2 boys together-which kind of freak me out.

It is their size and development age standing before me causes this uncomfortable feeling. Ouch, I am triggered; it is guttural. I choose to put my feelings aside. I must not think about it. I am having trouble answering the door. I am so glad and blessed that Michael is here with me. I am facing my fear. I have calmed my pulse and returned my focus to living in the present.

Thank you, God!

Mike is playing haunted house music for greater the effect. It’s 7:24 pm and we are beginning to watch Ender’s Game. I am feeling my feelings tonight. When the yellow team “took off” I could remember the bodily sensations of the apex a roller coaster and how my adrenaline would take off. There was a sharp intake of my breath. Then I let it go. It is interesting how my mind can recreate sensations just from my thoughts.

Oh no! We have less than 10 pieces of candy left. I was a bit wigged out from being triggered and had asked Michael to not leave me here to go buy more.

It is now 8:08 pm. We have turned the lights off. No more candy left. Mike bought a large quantity. We had guests for nearly an hour before we ran out of candy.

We may have had 40 or more. Maybe 50. I started giving 3 away to each one for several rounds. About fifteen minutes into the parade of kids, I backed off and gave just 2 pieces to each kid.

November 1, 2017

By counting pieces of candy purchased from the empty bags, I was able to create an estimate of 100 guests last night. How fun!

I learned this morning that Golf Hammock, our subdivision, is a favorite trick or treat spot. The lady at the YMCA told me that she only had 400 this year, down from 800 last year. She credits the sharp decline to it being a school night, conflicts with other cities hours; and additionally, Halloween was originally canceled due to all the Hurricane Irma debris.

Wow! This news opened my eyes! We will be better prepared next year.

Skinny Fat

We have returned from a wonderful Florida visit with some of the kids and grands. Since our family is scattered, we were unable to see Kaitlin, Brad and Jaxon. Of course, they were just visiting us a few weeks ago, so that helped. Additionally, I needed medical care at three locations, on opposites coasts of the state plus we chaperoned Addyson’s field trip to St. Augustine. As I sit and think about the memories made: teaching Addyson to blow her nose differently, Black Friday shopping, and me not cooking will be remembered long when I reflect back on Thanksgiving 2016.

While I am thankful for the lump under my arm was just a fat globule, I didn’t much relish hearing my favorite physical therapist tell me that I am “skinny fat”. I look great from great genes (thanks Mem!) so my desire to exercise is non-existent. My life motto has always been, ”I’ll exercise when I get fat”. Since I have been so blessed to never get fat, and was able to loose my baby weight quickly, I have never needed to do much more than skip sweet tea for a few weeks in order to maintain my size. (Please do not throw daggers at me, if you were dealt the “look at food—gain 5 pounds gene”). I am not sure why God in his Sovereignty gives one set of circumstances to one and to yet another a much easier bag to carry.

As I sat down this morning in my quiet little house, I was tempted to busy myself with unpacking, starting two weeks of laundry and mail. But then I heard You call me this morning. You asked me to come and sit with you a while. I wasn’t sure if I was to resume the Bible study, from the last class I took or what God was calling me to do. Then I felt him say:

Just get in The Word with Me.

So I grabbed my Bible and opened the cover. Pasted in the front of my inductive study Bible, is my “God and Company, Inc.” Motto. It comes from the Phillips Bible in Col 1:9-12.

“We are asking God that you may see things, as it were, from his point of view by being given spiritual insight an understanding. We also pray that you outwards lives, which men see, may bring credit to your Master’s name, and that you may bring joy to his heart by bearing genuine Christian fruit, and that your knowledge of God may grow yet deeper. “

“As you live this new life, we pray that you will be strengthened from God’s boundless resources, so that you will find yourselves able to pass through any experience and endure it with courage. You will even be able to thank God in the midst of pain and distress because you are privileged to to share the lot of those who are living in the light.”

Ah, yes Lord. Such sweet words that have carried me through breast cancer and more….

Then I feel the need to get my computer to write. I wonder what God has in store for me this morning? I have learned that if I do not power on the computer, I will miss all of the insights and sweet nuggets that the holy spirit places in my head. I will rehearse great words of insight to myself and loose them to forgetfulness moments later. So the computer is powering on and a notification pops up in the the lower right corner. It is my dear friend Ricky’s birthday today. Unfortunately he left this physical realm almost two years ago, leaving behind a wife who’s heart is still breaking.

Ah, thank you God for reminding me to reach out to her….Oh sweet Lord, comfort her. Hold her tight. Let her feel your peace and love in a real and mighty way today.

To Tammy: Sweet Sister, I am so sorry you are going through this. Just when you are starting to cope and get a small grip on life again, another important date comes…birthdays of our loved ones are not meant to be forgotten. I still bake my Momma’s lemon pound cake every year on her birthday. Please know the thoughts and prayers of others are being laid in the throne room of grace on your behalf. Live strong. Live loud. Live with courage. God speed!

Unable to Sleep

I have felt that God has been giving me an abundance of material for a book for quite some time.  I am not a writer.  I don’t know how to write a book.  The saying “a writer writes” keeps coming to mind so I have sat down at my keyboard awaiting divine inspiration.  My puppy Sophie is lying beside me, anxious to get down off the chair to play.  But its time to sleep so I struggle to get her to quiet down.  The TV is playing a recorded episode of Criminal Minds.  This show is Mike’s sleeping pill. I am midst another hot flash with sweat dripping under my hair.  As if this is not enough to keep track of I am half listening to Stasi Eldredge in the January message for the Women at the Well.  I am on the edge of sleep.  If I shut my eyes few minutes I would drift off to sleep since I am NOT in my bed. However, put me in bed and I am wide awake again.  I hope to overcome the insomnia.